What If a Child Refuses Parenting Time in Colorado?

A child’s refusal does not cancel a Colorado parenting time order, and the order stays enforceable until a court changes it. Your job at the moment is to stay calm, make genuine efforts to encourage the exchange, and document what happened, not to force your child physically or to quietly rewrite the schedule yourself.

What you do next depends on why the refusal is happening. Ordinary resistance, anxiety, teen scheduling conflicts, and true safety concerns each call for a different response, and this guide walks through all four.

At what age can a child choose in Colorado?

There is no set age at which a Colorado child can decide whether to attend parenting time. Under C.R.S. § 14-10-124, the court considers the child’s wishes if the child is sufficiently mature to express reasoned and independent preferences about the parenting time schedule. ^[1]

Even then, the child’s preference is one factor among many, and it never controls the outcome by itself. Until a judge modifies your Colorado child custody orders, the schedule in those orders is the schedule.

What do courts expect from each parent when a child refuses?

Courts expect the parent with the child to make real, good-faith efforts to encourage compliance. That means having the child ready, speaking positively about the other parent, following the exchange terms in your Colorado parenting plan, and treating the schedule as non-optional in your own words and actions.

Courts do not expect you to physically force a resisting child into a vehicle. The difference between “I could not make it happen despite genuine effort” and “I let it slide” is exactly what your documentation needs to show.

Am I in contempt if my teen refuses to go?

You can face enforcement exposure if the refusals become a pattern, because the other parent can file a verified motion under C.R.S. § 14-10-129.5 alleging substantial or continuing noncompliance with the parenting time order. ^[2] Remedies can include makeup parenting time, added conditions, counseling, and attorney fees against a noncomplying parent.

The strongest protection is evidence of genuine effort. A parent who documented consistent encouragement, notified the other parent promptly, and sought help early looks very different to a judge than a parent who shrugged.

What if my child says they are afraid?

Take it seriously and find out what is behind the words before deciding anything. Fear can reflect a genuine safety problem, but it can also reflect anxiety about transitions, loyalty conflict between households, or reaction to ordinary discipline.

If you believe your child is in imminent physical or emotional danger during parenting time, Colorado law provides emergency motions to restrict parenting time under C.R.S. § 14-10-129, and the court must hear and rule on that motion within 14 days while interim parenting time is supervised. ^[3] Call 911 in an immediate emergency, and use court form JDF 1406, which requires specific facts rather than general accusations. ^[4]

Safety concern, anxiety, alienation, or ordinary resistance?

Match your response to the cause. This is the framework Colorado family law attorneys use to sort refusal cases.

What should you document?

• Every refusal, the same day. Date, time, location, who was present, and what your child said and did.
• Your efforts. What you did to encourage the exchange, in specific terms.
• Prompt notice. A brief, factual message to the other parent when an exchange fails, without editorializing.
• Professional input. Therapy appointments, school counselor contacts, and any recommendations you followed.
• Makeup offers. Any alternative time you proposed to offset the missed visit.

Checklist: what to do at the exchange itself

• Have your child packed, ready, and on time, every time.
• Keep your tone neutral and encouraging; children read your cues.
• Do not negotiate the order at the door or in front of the child.
• If the child refuses despite your efforts, calmly end the attempt, notify the other parent in writing, and log it.
• Never use physical force, and never punish the child for the other parent’s schedule.

Can we change the schedule instead of fighting it?

Yes, and for older children it is often the honest fix. When the current plan no longer works, either parent can pursue changing parenting time in Colorado under C.R.S. § 14-10-129, which asks whether a modification serves the child’s best interests.

Tools short of a full modification can also help, including family therapy and parenting coordination. The wrong move is informal drift, where the real schedule and the court order slowly stop matching and both parents lose their footing.

Common questions when a child refuses parenting time

Can the police make my child go to the other parent’s house?

Generally no. Parenting time orders are civil orders, and officers rarely intervene in a child’s refusal beyond keeping the peace. Enforcement runs through the court, not a curbside standoff, and involving police at exchanges usually escalates the conflict your child is reacting to.

Do I have to physically force my child into the car?

No. Colorado courts expect genuine, documented encouragement, not physical force. If encouragement fails repeatedly, the answer is professional help, an enforcement response, or a modification, depending on the cause.

Does a teenager’s refusal end the parenting plan?

No. The order remains binding on both parents until a court changes it, no matter how firm the teen’s opinion is. A mature teen’s preference is evidence a court will consider in a modification, which is the proper channel for it.

Get Ahead of the Problem Before It Becomes an Enforcement Case

Repeated missed exchanges harden into an enforcement problem quickly, and the record you build now decides how that goes. Johnson Law Group can give you a clear read on why the refusals are happening, what a judge will expect from you, and whether enforcement, therapy, or a schedule change is the right move.

Our family law attorneys work with families from offices across Colorado, in person or virtually. Schedule a free, no-pressure consultation today.

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